adolescence

tea party simplicity
and a greasy disgust
greeted one another in the miscarriage
of my adolescence
private illnesses, violent thoughts, standard pains
greeted one another in the accounts of their own little troubles
compelled to spend no longer restoring promise
i lit the golf course on fire
explored women's underwear
and stole sterling silverware
as dancing couples brushed past me
disgusted with myself
i tried to form
an ethic
more immersed in suffering than even i could bear