first steps, new orleans

i hesitate at each step, here
my home away from home
forgotten from all the same angles
along canal, i hear the call, feel
down where the bottom is split with rails and wires
the spirits wake and spit and sleep
my own left hand belongs to me less, that mess
that bad hand, the hands of david she told me on royal,
pulling my hair, virile
i drag my ass to the corner of decatur
heavy purposeful ancient gator
i know disaster is having her way with me
she never gonna let me go
that's so, and so and so, and still i forgot
where her thigh rubs up against the back of my hand,
up along rampart, up along the edges, i forgot,
up along the cemeteries, i forgot, up along the projects, i forgot
up where the road meets the bayou,
up where the shotguns are like dominoes, i forgot
how city park spoke to me in the dark and promised
things she couldn't deliver
how i ran to the river, that dark and muddled flow,
and huddled with my arms around my knees
crying into the rocks and dirt, and
that muddy it took every bit and didn't give a shit
welcome home baby



and i would like to turn the corner and see you,
mickey and oliver, otter and squish, jay and jane and chain, thomai and toni and hans, and ralph and mat and michele, steven and adrain and wash and valerie and rodney and chris and pretty boy jason and lj and jason and jeannette and lee and tod and brian and kate and ade and all the saints...